turning your orbit around

or... the utter enormity of the task


lock your doors and tie down your valuables...

because roberto is coming to steamboat springs!!

that's right, folk, mista overman will be visiting wild and wonderful colorado starting this thursday, march 3rd. i know he's looking forward to it, since most of the voicemails i've received from him this winter have gone something like this:

"willis! this is rob calling.
it's 65 degrees and i'm wearing flip-flops.
this sucks."

central north carolina is a tough place to be if you're a ski bum. now rob will just have to figure out where he's going to kennel his mama while he's out here.

oh snap!!

in other news, big pants sounds like a real band. we had our best practice yet yesterday, and now have over an hour of music. we'll be putting a demo together in hopes of getting a regular gig this spring or summer. we play bar mitzvahs and weddings too.

sorry, we don't play circumcisions.

the strongest songs from our repertoire:

california stars/wilco
rescue blues - you can't always get what you want/ryan adams - rolling stones
bertha/grateful dead
franklin's tower/grateful dead
driver 8/r.e.m.
an original acid funk jam/russell funke
just kissed my baby/the meters
the golden age/beck
what i got/sublime
don't push/sublime
rodeo clowns/jack johnson
a 2 chord zappa jam
muffin man - bubbly toes/frank zappa - jack johnson (if you think pairing these 2 is as funny as i think it is, raise your hand)
big pants blues/yours truly

peace out, folks.


big pants blues

wrote a new song. with music and everything this time - a good old fashioned 12 bar blues of sorts (in the key of G, and you hang on the D chord a little longer than normal). don't know what to call it, but big pants blues is the working title for now.

(because jenn reads my blog sometimes, i should include a disclaimer: the second verse is completely fictional - there are no ex-girlfriends calling me out of the blue to arrange a meeting)

big pants blues

it was a medical morning
popping pills to keep things from getting boring
with my former self upstairs snoring
it was a medical morning
and tom waits was playing low on the radio

she calls me up to arrange a meeting
the machine picks up with my standard greeting
the voices in our hearts can be so fleeting
the voices in our hearts can be so fleeting
and hers left mine a long long time ago

i'm angry with the sun outside
the television has gone all black and white
i wish i could get up and go for a ride
i'm angry with the sun outside
but ain't that just the way it goes (sometimes)

i've lost track of the world and everything in it
it turns faster minute by minute
it's a big old mess any way you spin it
it turns faster minute by minute
i guess i'll have to let the music take me home


virus and loathing in steamboat springs

hunter s. thompson is dead.
he took his life with a shotgun to the head.

yes, i choose to trivialize his life and work with a rhyming couplet. but mostly because i'm pissed off. what an asshole. there are no more freak flags to fly in the roaring fork valley. this crazy, gun-loving iconoclast was the last link to aspen's funky past. now it's all mink coats, sheepskin boots, and million dollar skier contracts. with thompson gone, that valley lost what little bit of soul it had left.

i'll miss him.

in other news, i'm still sick. this f%*king sucks. 3 times this winter. getting in a couple hours here or there at work, but mostly it's movies and couch time at home. i wouldn't wish this on anyone.

well, i might wish it on paris hilton. and maybe that jen girl from abc's "the bachelorette." but that's it.


sick boy

now, i know when you pick up and move somewhere you're subjecting your immune system to all kinds of stresses, and all kinds of new germs that you're now more susceptible to because of all those new stresses.

but come on!!! this is getting ridiculous.

i am sick again. hacking up great green globs of gooey goodness. head is stuffed and throat is sore, and i am so disheartened i just want to jump off a mountain. i can't be sick again! that's 3 times this winter!!!

i have this to say, people: wash your hands until they're raw and bleeding.

and don't work in libraries. they're friggin' petrie dishes.


no cause for alarm

i just went and re-read my previous post, and the line about jenn and me having a kid sounded kind of cranky.

don't worry folks, there's no brad pitt/jennifer aniston drama going on here. jenn and i are on the same timetable for kids.

there is one thing we cannot agree on, though. when we do have a kid, i will insist on calling it junior - regardless of its actual name or gender.

that really, really makes jenn crazy.

new pic

i have a new pic for my profile. it will be the cover for my imaginary first solo album, whenever that may be. if it remains imaginary, i suppose never. but at least i have something to show my kid to prove that his old man rocked.

but first, i guess jenn and i need to have a kid.

speaking of kids, my buddy brandon and his wife erica are due in the next few weeks. it's their first, and brandon - true to form - got an online pool going regarding the baby's arrival date, weight, length and sex.

brandon likes to gamble.

jenn and i are down for a bouncing baby boy, 7 lbs 9 oz, 21 inches, on february 24 at 9:19 p.m.

if any of you who read this blog out there know b & e, and would like to get in on this pool action, go to expectnet, and in the login field enter the name BabyKuhl.

good luck brandon and erica! i love you guys!


cold rocked the sock hop

last night, big pants played its first "show" in the college gymnasium. it didn't go exactly as planned, but it was a good time nonetheless. we played the first annual CMC ring of pain night, in which students boxed with enormous oversized gloves (weighing about 2 pounds apiece) inside a big cartoon blow-up oversize ring. you've all seen people wrestle in the big sumo suits? this is the boxing equivalent of that.

there were 4 bouts on the fight card, each one lasting 3 rounds. the kids would come out all amped up, boucing around, and go at each other. after about a minute and a half they'd drop the heavy gloves, double over and start wheezing. one kid said, between huge asthma breaths, "i've never been so tired in my life!" it was funny, funny shit.

big pants played between fights. so, we didn't get to play all the songs we wanted, and we had a tough time with feedback until we figured out which mike was "hot."

but, i was only nervous for a second, we sounded pretty good, and we're getting there. we stuck around afterward, and even though all the kids left, we played a bunch just to hear ourselves somewhere other than our practice space.

our biggest problem? we need to figure out how to end songs. we're happy just jamming, and nobody really cues everyone else as to when we should end it.

we should change our name to "the endless jam."


this next one is the first song on our new album

i am an hour away from the big pants live debut, drummer and all. the set list is as follows:

what i got/sublime
california stars/wilco
ain't no sunshine/bill withers
rescue blues - you can't always get what you want/ryan adams - rolling stones
a 2 chord frank zappa jam
muffin man/captain beefheart (more zappa)
golden age/beck

i'm nervous, but not too bad. i think it's gonna be good. and fun. i'll have a full report tomorrow.

wish me luck.


winter returns

4 inches of wet snow yesterday, and about 8 inches of light and dry overnight. winter has decided to rear its beautiful white head again here in steamboat after a lengthy hiatus. the valley is sparkling, a powder day beckoned this morning, and i... came to work.

what a sucker i am.

in other news, big pants practiced today, and i sucked. our 6th practice, and things had been going so swimmingly. except for our first song we all played kind of ragged, and i had a serious case of "no confidence." which is crazy because we're all real supportive of one another. it was just one of those days. i wish it had happened last week, because tomorrow night is our first gig, and to have a bad practice the day before your first gig is a major bummer.

but, it's a gig in front of students at a school function, and they won't know any better when we mess up. students make great guinea pigs.

i just need to get over it, and keep reciting to myself that mantra made famous by twisted sister:

i wanna rock.


flippin' awesome

good news people! neepa jo got a new job! my wife is now the marketing director and events coordinator for the steamboat springs arts council. that's a big time job! and i just can't stress enough how difficult it can be to get this kind of job in a ski town. i'm so happy for her - she can't wait to start. she liked her old job, but this new one is more in line with what she was doing when we were in denver. celebratory dinner tomorrow night. sweeeeeeeeet.

in other news, the seed of an idea for a new song:

starbucks and robitussin

i'm drinking coffee and cough syrup
and it's just about 11 o'clock
the television tells me to join the navy
with flashy graphics and a little punk rock

and headlights are sliding down fish creek falls drive

it's so cold on a clear night
flakes crystallize right out of thin air
she cups her palm and lights a cigarette
and kicks snow at the foot of the stairs

and girls and boys are riding down fish creek falls drive

never thought i'd be here
but i'm so glad i am
neon lights buzz in liquor stores
i circle back but turn around again

music escapes through open doors
corduroys zip to the beat
drunks giving what-for and much more
as college kids stumble down the street

and i'm driving home on fish creek falls drive



damn, this is fun.

illinois knocked off the tenth ranked michigan state spartans at michigan state last night. another impressive showing on the road, against the second best team in the big ten conference. second best to illinois, of course.

now, illinois basketball has been a consistently good to stellar program since kruger took over in '96. i am not of the attitude some take, saying "it's about time something good happened to insert team's name here." year in and year out, it's a joy being an illini basketball fan.

however, i am of the opinion that we should stay on this carnival ride for as long as the jaded, fickle, toothless and meth-addled carnie will let us. undefeated at 22 and 0? faster, please. number 1 in the nation for 9 weeks? higher, please. winning at wisconsin and michigan state in consecutive weeks? more spins, please. possibly the most favorable ncaa tournament site assignments for a team in march madness history? thank you, mister carnie, may i have another.

y'know that first big hill on any rollercoaster, where you click up and up and up, gripping the restraint bar in joyous and fearful anticipation of the drop on the other side that will make your stomach feel all funny? if the illini continue to play this well, we haven't even crested that hill yet.

i don't want to get off this ride, folks.